aardvark molester wants your help finding her role in life! Take this short quiz to assess aardvark molester's personality and match aardvark molester with the role (and top careers/colleges) best suited for her personality and interests. Just decide whether or not you agree with the following statements.

Make sure you enter your name and upload a picture so aardvark molester knows that you took her quiz.




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The elderly, foster kids and animal welfare be damned: for aardvark molester, "non-profit" is a non-option.

Strongly disagree Strongly agree

It would be satisfying for aardvark molester to fire someone she didn't like, even if they were doing a good job.

Strongly disagree Strongly agree

aardvark molester needs a career her Mom or Dad (or Wife/Sister/Brother/friends) can brag about.

Strongly disagree Strongly agree

aardvark molester spends at least a half hour at the gym every day to keep her smokin' bod in shape--never know when she will need to whip off her shirt for a cheesecake calendar photo shoot.

Strongly disagree Strongly agree

aardvark molester needs three cups of coffee to shock herself to functional by 10 am.

Strongly disagree Strongly agree

According to aardvark molester, "A job is a job - its primary purpose is to keep aardvark molester housed, clothed and fed."

Strongly disagree Strongly agree

What is aardvark molester's role in life?


Career Counselor
Matt Foley
(Saturday Night Live)

Advertising Salesperson
Nick Marshall
(What Women Want)

Lawyer / Attorney
Lt. Daniel Kaffee
(A Few Good Men)

EMS & Paramedic
Dr. Tony Gates
(ER)
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